


il y a ton sourire,

by bo_bo_hu



Category: EXO (Band), Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: (idkwhat to tag so i say random things), (ill add tags later), And Baek Is A Real Drama Queen, Baekhyun Just Wants To Eat Some Ice Cream And Cry, Cheating, Existential Crisis, F/M, M/M, Oh, Or Some Cookies, Or Some Smut, Slow Burn, Some Fluff, Some angst, Ugly cries
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-09
Updated: 2019-12-09
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:41:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21698671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bo_bo_hu/pseuds/bo_bo_hu
Summary: Baekhyun has everything to be happy about, a pretty girlfriend, a lovely dog, a well-paid job, good friends and a big house.However,something is missing.
Relationships: Bae Joohyun | Irene/Byun Baekhyun, Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol
Comments: 4
Kudos: 16





	1. il y a l'ombre et la lumière sur ma trajectoire

Every morning it's the same music to his ears, the sound of the bacon on the pan and his girlfriend singing with an angelic voice some words she has in her head. Two beautiful things. He never stays in his bed for long, just long enough to stretch his tired body and rub his little eyes, then he gets up.

Dressed only in black basketball shorts, he joined his girlfriend in the kitchen. And as every morning she has the same reaction, she jumps because she doesn't hear him dragging his feet all the way and then laughs lovingly at Baekhyun's sleepy puppy look, blond hair in the air and his sweet sleepy face.

"Breakfast is almost ready." She says, or rather sings, joyfully. Like every morning.

The same words.

The same way of announcing them.

The same smile.

Baekhyun sits down and watches her, silent. Since when did everything become so... predictable? It's like he can guess what she's going to do next.

"Turn and add salt." He murmurs to himself, eyes analyze Joohyun's hands. As expected she turns the bacon slices on the pan and adds salt. Baekhyun hates it when she does that, the bacon is already salty enough as it is, why does she add even more salt? He has always wondered about it, but today it's no longer whay really bothers him.

It was a long morning. Baekhyun was not as bubbly and talkative as usual, Joohyun even asked him if he was sick by putting a hand against his forehead. He just assured her that he was tired, with a somewhat forced smile not to worry her. These are only doubts and he cares about Joohyun, he knows it, he feels it, otherwise he would not have asked her to live with him. Little doubts that will eventually fade over time, he will learn to stop thinking about them. He'll make it, won't he?

His first breath of air was when he left the house, slamming the front door. His day can finally begin and Baekhyun knows that once at work, his thoughts are put aside and he can be more cool, brighter, more him. At first, working in an office disturbed him a lot, he felt trapped, suffocated, cut off from the world, but he learned to love his job. Admittedly it's sometimes repetitive, administration is not the most entertaining or amusing thing ever, but there are days when there are dramas in the office and it's always a pleasure to go and discuss them at the coffee break. Baekhyun feels like he is being revived, as if he were back a few years ago, when he was just a high school cute boy and his only concern was who was sleeping with who.

"And you, Baek, when do you propose to your girlfriend?"

The blond loses his smile, hates this turnaround. The boys look at him, some laugh, but all are waiting for the answer. He sips his black, bitter coffee and shrugs his shoulders.

"We're fine like that, that's enough for us."

"Come on Baek, we all know she's waiting for that."

"I swear, she knows very well that I'm not considering getting married, it's not in my plans."

"It wasn't in your plans to live with her either." Jongdae mocks, one hand on Baekhyun's shoulder. "It wasn't in your plans to stay with her after college either, if I remember correctly."

Outch. Baekhyun's body tenses, annoyed by questions, annoyed by remarks and above all annoyed that all eyes are on him. He hates this kind of attention, judged by these pairs of eyes that enlarge with surprise at Jongdae's remark.

"I changed my mind." He answers coldly and leaves the room like a perfect dramaqueen.

He goes to his desk to sulk, buries his head in his hands and sighs for a long time. All this bullshit gave him a huge headache.

"Yah Baekhyun!"

Baekhyun rolls his eyes and sighs again. Jongdae's big voice doesn't help at all to calm the drums in his head.

"Hey, what's wrong with you? We were just laughing."

Despite Baekhyun's reluctance, Jongdae massages his shoulders. They have been friends for far too long, Jongdae knows how to calm Baekhyun's nerves, but above all he knows that the blond is not the type to get angry for nothing. It's rare when he loses his compost and when it happens, Jongdae knows he has to intervene.

"Nothing, Dae, I'm tired, okay?"

He lies to convince himself that this is all it is, the fatigue that weighs on his body and not the impression that nothing fills him in his life. He has everything, he doesn't have the right to feel so unhappy, so that must be it, fatigue.

"Okay..."

Obviously Jongdae knows him too well to know he's lying, but he decides not to push. The little one may be, usually, an adorable little puppy with a hyperactive touch, but he still has his little temper and the last thing to do would be to force and frustrate him even more. Jongdae drops his shoulders and sits on Baekhyun's desk with a happy smile on his face.

"Anyway, do you remember that tonight we have a gig in that bar?"

How could he forget? Immediately Baekhyun's eyes meet, at last, those of Jongdae. They have the same passion for singing, it's their favorite subject of conversation. He nods his head gently, with a slight pout.

"It's gonna be great, I'm so excited. Just a guy's night out, singing and playing and drinking."

In itself, the perfect plan to boost Baekhyun's mood and Jongdae knows that. Just the perspective makes his eyes all shine with impatience and excitement.

The day was long, simply because he was too excited to be at this bar. It's been several months since he last sang in public and he misses it so much. So as soon as it was time, Baekhyun took his things and ran home to take a shower and get ready.

Tonight he is Baekhyun, the real one, he doesn't need to wear a cotton shirt or have his face totally bare. He can be what he wants, the artist he is, so he doesn't refuse to put on his most extravagant clothes. Black vinyl pants, a black and white sweater, jewellery around his neck and a line of eyeliner.

"Smoking hot baby. I don't know if I'm still okay with letting you go without me." Joohyun hugs his waist from behind, both of them look at each other in the mirror. Or rather they're looking at Baekhyun.

"Don't worry, you know, it's just a guys thing and-" He's cutting it off by the doorbell and immediately runs off to open the door. Mongryong in his legs, runs happily with his tongue hanging next to his daddy.

"Ready?"

Baekhyun has a broad smile and nods. "More than ready."

"Okay, let's go before we're late. Joohyun, Mongryong, have a good evening." Jongdae exclaims, but crouches down to caress the corgi's head. "Your daddy's gonna make it rain bras tonight." He whispers to Mongryong, who barks joyfully.

"I heard that." Joohyun smiles, but crosses her arms. She's used to Jongdae's _jokes_.

"That's what it's like to be in a relationship with a rock sta- outch."

"Shut up." Baekhyun laughs, hitting Jongdae to keep his mouth shut, then kisses Joohyun. 

Just a soft peck.

Out of habit.

"See you later."

The two friends walk to Jongdae's car and Baekhyun can't stop smiling. While his friend unlocks his car, he looks up to the sky and looks up at the stars, still with that happy smile on his glossy lips. It's as if he's breathing after a long day of holding back and he's finally happy. This thought crossed his mind and disturbed him for a second before Jongdae cleared his throat to bring Baekhyun back to earth.

"Stop stargazing or we'll be late."

During the car ride, Baekhyun doesn't stand still, he sings, dances in his seat and keeps shaking Jondgae's arm as he tries to drive despite the annoying puppy sitting next to him.

"Dae! Dae look!"

He is trying to get his attention while he is trying to touch his nose with his tongue. He swears, he can touch it, he's almost there.

"Dae-"

"Baek, I'm driving!"

Baekhyun stops everything, shaken by Jongdae's voice. He never yelled at him before and it's fucking scary. Baekhyun's heart almost ran away.

"I'm sorry." The blond apologizes sadly, ready to sulk in his seat.

"No, it's me, sorry Baek, I know you're all excited and I'm all excited too, but... ahaha, no, it's stupid."

"What? Oh no, you don't start a sentence without finishing it, it frustrates me." He sighs, forcing his friend to give him attention.

Jongdae is always super happy, super hyper and always there for him when he needs to talk, so if this time it's Jongdae who needs it, he'll take his job very seriously.

"Tell me, Dae."

"I... okay, I'm nervous." The brown sighs, his fingers tremble on the steering wheel and Baekhyun frown, confused. Jongdae has never been nervous before, at least not when it comes to performing, on the contrary it's always a source of joy for both of them.

"About what?"

Baekhyun hesitates for a second before asking him that, since when his friend avoids looking him in the eye, it's because he is hiding something from him and if part of Baekhyun is curious to know, the other part, on the other hand, doesn't really want to know.

As if he already knew what it was all about.

When the boy doesn't answer, a wave of panic overwhelms him.

God no.

"Dae..." He begs him with his cutest voice, begs him to erase his doubts.

"It's Chanyeol, he will be there tonight."

Oh,

shit.


	2. Acide à s'en brûler le coeur,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My fingers somewhat misspelled Jongdae's name from time to time, sorry bby, i love you anyway.

The rest of the ride is silent. Baekhyun's back is stuck in his seat and his eyes don't leave the road, they don't even blink anymore. He understands better why Jongdae is nervous, and now he, himself, is starting to be nervous.

"Look Baek, I... I didn't invite him. I didn't know he was coming until tonight."

Jongdae glups, the relationship between Baekhyun and Chanyeol is conflictual, no one has ever really known why the two didn't get along, but during the university years they all witnessed their constant fights. About everything and anything. Sometimes it started with a sentence, a word, a look or a way of walking. Everything was a pretext and yet they had to put up with each other because they had the same friends. They _have_ the same friends, but Baekhyun never heard from Chanyeol again after college, when he moved to New York. Well, until today.

"I don't care Dae, we go there to sing, not to see him." He shrugs, puts it in perspective. He can support the presence of Chanyeol for one evening, yeah he can, after all time has passed and he doesn't care about Chanyeol, he can come if he wants. Baekhyun doesn't give a shit. And yet a ball forms in his stomach.

It gets bigger when they both enter the bar. It's still early, there are few customers so he quickly spotted his friends. They are already drinking and laughing, Baekhyun smiles at this image, it reminds him of when they were in the cafeteria. His smile disappears when his eyes land on him. Chanyeol.

It's impossible not to notice him with his pink hair, his Dumbo ears and his always exaggerated laughter. He always needs to have the light on him, incredible. Baekhyun rolls his eyes and crosses his arms, yet he continues to observe him in the distance.

"He's fucking kidding me." He murmurs, then moves forward with a determined step towards the group of friends, followed by a panicked Jongdae who runs after him.

"Dae, Baek-"

"It's _my_ color."

He doesn't even pay attention to the others around him, his eyes only see Chanyeol and his blue sweat. Blue. It's Baekhyun's color. HIS color. Chanyeol's surprised by Baekhyun's abrupt arrival and observes him as well.

"Woah, it's good to see you too, Byun."

Baekhyun boils over inside, he wants to rip off his proud little smile and shove it deep up his ass. He opens his mouth to answer, but before he can continue on this path, Jongdae firmly grabs Baekhyun by the shoulders.

"Hey, guys, sorry we're late. Why don't we get started?" He begs them with his eyes and everyone understands.

"Baekhyun, have a drink, I'll check the guitar with Chanyeol." One of them announces and all of them start to disperse.

Baekhyun tsked, his eyes are still on Chanyeol.

"1 second, you held on for 1 second before jumping down his throat. What's your problem? Can't you act like an adult?" His friends reprimand him, but Baekhyun can't hear anything. He takes a glass of whiskey down like water and turns around.

"I wonder why we keep him as a guitarist. He was never very good at it." He speaks loud enough like that Chanyeol can hear him despite the distance between the table and the stage. Baekhyun sees Chanyeol's eyes moving and smirks. "I mean, I know it was because we felt sorry for him, but still, bringing him back from New York just to make us look stupid, you shouldn't have."

"Baek, be cool, please."

The blond guy looks at his friend, outraged.

"I am cool, I accept his existence and I accept him in the group, he should thank me instead of always making me angry."

It's like talking to a wall, Jongdae shakes his hand and gives up, anyway this little being is far too stubborn to be reasoned.

The long-awaited hour arrives and Baekhyun takes his place as a vocalist on the stage, for this first song he is in the center and this is his favorite place, this is where he belongs, standing in front of the audience. There are quite a few of them tonight, he's delighted. They start with a song that Jongdae wrote when they were in university, a song they haven't sung since. A song for three voices, Baekhyun, Jongdae and Kyungsoo, three different timbres that blend perfectly. Jongin is at the piano while Chanyeol is playing guitar.

It's a soft, beautiful, melodious, sensual song. Jongdae sings his part, then Kyungsoo. Baekhyun is getting ready, excited, to sing the chorus. He approaches his lips to the microphone, his eyes look at the room and he suppresses his smile to put himself in the melody. He moves his head and starts to sing, the first word singing gives him an extraordinary feeling of well-being and peace.

Well, almost.

His eyebrows are frowning. Something's not right.

He continues to sing his lines, but not as good as he wanted. Someone is singing with him.

No, not someone, Chanyeol.

His fist clenched, but he took the time to sing, as if everything was perfect and totally planned, but in his head he was already planning the murder of Chanyeol. Jongdae panics a little bit but once the song is over he takes the mic to thank everyone.

"Don't fall asleep, we'll be back in five minutes." Added Baekhyun, a broad smile that makes his mochis come out to charm his audience, he improvised a little break determined to tell Chanyeol to shut up.

"You!" He grabs the guitarist's arm violently and takes him with him under the stunned eyes of the other musicians who smile nervously at each other. Enough, he wants to enjoy this moment, enjoy every piece of it and Chanyeol ruins it, ruins everything. He takes him to the room at the back of the bar, the reserve, and pushes him in the middle of the room.

"Okay, I don't know what your problem is, but you should calm down. Or get fucked. Besides, I heard you were still with Joohyun, she's going go-"

"Shut up." Baekhyun breathes to regain his calm, but Chanyeol is not a great help, especially when his girlfriend's name rolls on his lips. "What the hell are you doing here anyway? Don't you have a life I don't know where?" He crosses his arms, his hard and accusing gaze on Chanyeol.

"I didn't come back for you if that's your question." The giant mocks, smiles snide as a bonus. Baekhyun bites his cheek in rage. "I missed Seoul. And you know exactly where I was, maybe even know exactly what I was doing there."

"Honestly? I don't give a shit, whether you're here or there, whether you do, just stop ruining my evening."

"You're already ruining it by yourself." He giggles, a forced laugh just because he knows how it annoys Baekhyun. "As soon as you see me, you jump on me, you don't even wait until we're in private." He adds with a smile, judging Baekhyun. "You haven't changed a bit." His smile grows and Baekhyun feels like vomiting at all these insinuations. He knows Chanyeol is laughing at him, teasing him to piss him off and the worst thing is that it works. It always works.

"I've changed, I've learned to make better decisions." His tongue is sarcastic for the simple purpose of hurting Chanyeol.

He thinks so, he made good decisions in his life. Very good and has no regrets.

"Is lying to Joohyun a good decision? What's the next step, are you going to have children with her, marry her and live happily ever after?"

"I never lied to her."

"To omit to tell the truth is like lying, Baekhyun." He snorts, leaving a sulky Baekhyun in front of him.

This vision is too delicious for Chanyeol, delighted to know that after all these years he still manages to get him into his states just by his simple presence. At the time, his favorite activity was to annoy the blond, he bet every morning that he would do better than the day before, he realized that, after two years, he couldn't stop thinking about Baekhyun morning, noon and night, even if he only thought of pissing him off and seeing his face turn red with rage. Baekhyun had become the person with whom he wanted to spend the most time, whom he wanted to see first the next day and even if they didn't get along and the boy screamed every time he hated his presence, they were always together.

"Pout all you want, we have a show to do. You can stay here if you want, we don't really need you." Chanyeol stings, again and again, this time Baekhyun rolls his eyes.

"Of course, I'm the singer. You just know how to make two chords and sing in the back. If there's one person we don't need, it's you." He says haughtily, turns around and walks towards the stage. The 5 minutes have already passed, they are expected and Baekhyun doesn't want to stay one more minute in this room with this jerk. "Oh, by the way." He stops and turns again to look at Chanyeol. "A word of advice, your voice is really not made for singing, so shut up, okay?"

He's not waiting for his answer and leaves.

With a nod, Baekhyun confirms to Jongdae that everything is fine and they can resume. Lighter, he sings the next song beautifully and Chanyeol keeps quiet. Finally he frees himself, he feels like he is flying and the applause and whistles make him so happy. He proudly thanks the audience and smiles at his friends, all happy. For the next one, they sing a cover, Creep, a song he used to sing all the time with Jongdae in his car. Chanyeol tunes his guitar to follow them and they start.

The beginning is soft, calm, Baekhyun closes his eyes and lets himself be carried away by the melody and lyrics of the song. He opens his lips to get some air just before singing the chorus.

"Bu-"

He suddenly opens his eyes, his word has been stolen from him. Worse, his chorus was stolen from him.

Chanyeol is singing Baekhyun's words without even being embarrassed. Shocked, Baekhyun looks at him, then looks at Jongdae, but it's the audience that attracts his attention. He hears voices, "woah"s, compliments? For who? Chanyeol? He sings like a pan.

Irritated, the capricious child squeezes his fingers around the microphone, but doesn't listen. He's too busy insulting Chanyeol in his head to be careful. It's when Jongdae hits his arm that he realizes it's his turn to sing, Chanyeol can steal his chorus, but he won't steal his high notes. And he performs them perfectly with his honey voice, until he is breathless.

Only two songs left, but Baekhyun has trouble getting into the songs, each time pulled from his dream by the pain in the ass behind his back.

The group meets at the bar for a drink after their performance. As always, people come to congratulate them and Baekhyun likes these kinds of moments. These people aren't even fans, but they appreciate the voices, the instruments, the music and especially Baekhyun likes to be complimented. It happens often, he is aware that he has a voice made for singing, especially since he masters it rather well and loves to play with it, but tonight he quickly understands that it isn't his evening. No, all eyes are on Chanyeol who smiles timidly at them.

Baekhyun rolls his eyes, disgusted, clearly jealous, a disgusting jealousy, but above all he doesn't understand. He doesn't find Chanyeol's voice "sexy". He doesn't think he's singing right or well.

"Don't take this for yourself, it's just to boost your fragile little ego, they are way too nice like us when we accepted you into the group." Yes, he's sweating jealousy, but he's far too proud to admit it. To admit that he may be in very bad faith or hate him to the point of being unable to hear what others hear.

Chanyeol laughs and sends him to hell by shaking his hand vaguely, because he knows that if anyone has a fragile ego tonight, it's Baekhyun. So he decides to ignore the blond to enjoy his moment of glory, conscious of the murderous looks that Baekhyun throws at him all evening.

In other words, Baekhyun didn't have any fun, and two days later he's still on a loop about it. After a while, Jongdae stopped replying to his messages, annoyed that Baekhyun keeps talking about Chanyeol. Even Baekhyun doesn't know what pisses him off anymore, is it the fact that he stole the show? Or that he did it on purpose to piss him off? Or the fact that he came back without telling him? No, he doesn't care. Why would it affect him when they've never been friends? Chanyeol can be in Seoul if he wants to. Or he can go back to the other side of the world, that's fine too.

"Babe, stop making that face." He comes out of his thoughts, invoked by Joohyun's sweet voice. She smoothes his frown with her thumbs and smiles gently.

"Sorry, I'm a little out of everything." He relaxes his face and takes Joohyun's hands in his own.

"Are you thinking about your birthday?" She asks, totally oblivious.

"Yes, my birthday." He lies, but it's better that way, he doesn't want to bother her with all these negative thoughts about an old classmate. This is stupid.

"Hey, don't worry, 28 years is still young." She teases and pinches his cheek. "You're lucky to be so cute for your age."

"I'm not cute." He growls, but he looks more like a puppy trying to show his fangs than a tiger. That's probably why she's laughing.

"You're the cutest." She kisses him gently, her lips taste like cherries and her skin is soft to the touch. He really doesn't know what he did to deserve such a perfect girlfriend.

She deepens the kiss by sitting on Baekhyun's lap, the latter leans on the kiss without hesitation, he needs a distraction to get Chanyeol out of his head. It's been so long since they've been that close, she kisses his neck while Baekhyun's hands caress her thighs revealed under her skirt. Her soft lips against his skin make him hard, excited, in demand, but he makes the mistake of closing his eyes for a second and it's Chanyeol that comes into his mind.

"Fuck." He murmurs between his teeth and pushes Joohyun back a little too hard as she falls to the ground. "Shit, sorry, are you okay?"

"Baek! What the fuck?" He reaches out his hand to help her get up, but she hits it and gets up without his help.

"I'm... sorry, I'm just not in the mood."

She readjusts her skirt and sighs. "You're not in the mood. You're never in the mood."

Baekhyun shrugs at her words, but her gaze hits him in the heart. If there is one thing he can't stand, it's to see the pain in Joohyun's eyes.

"Joo, it's not that, I have so much work that I end up thinking about my boss all the time." He laughs nervously, she knows his boss, a 73-year-old man, an unstoppable crouton.

"I just feel like... you're not attracted to me anymore, you... do you... do you still love me?"

He wasn't ready for that question. He wasn't ready, but he can't find the answer either. An answer that should be easy, immediate, but he doesn't have it. His heart starts to panic so he grabs Joohyun's hand.

"Of course I love you, Joo, you're the love of my life."

She smiles, reassured. He smiles to see her reassured, but his smile disappears when she leaves the room.

Because he lied.

He tries not to think too much about it, seeing Joohyun happy must make him happy and she gives herself so much to organize a birthday party that he has no right to make her unhappy. He will oblige himself if it comes to that.

"I was thinking, we could just invite close friends, college and work friends. Something intimate, what do you think?"

"It's perfect."

The plan was perfect and Baekhyun looked forward to this evening. His closest friends are invited, his band of course, and they even took their instruments "just in case". Of course they're going to play tonight, it's for Baekhyun's honor.

Speaking of Baekhyun, he shines tonight, dressed in a blue satin shirt, open with a few buttons to let a little of his milky chest appear decorated with silver necklaces. His hair is styled in such a way as to show his forehead and highlight his eyes with a little amber blush. He feels good, beautiful, comfortable and can enjoy this evening around his friends, filled with joy and love, laughter and songs.

Until someone knocked.

"Don't move, I'm going." Joohyun kisses his cheek and walks towards the door.

Curious, Baekhyun follows her with his eyes. The door opens but he doesn't see who is there, hidden by the imposing wooden door. However, Joohyun hugs the person and it alerts Baekhyun even more.

"Baekkie!" She exclaims excitedly from across the room. "Oh, my God, you'll never guess who's here." Her wide smile betrays her immense joy.

"Is this a fucking joke?"

**Author's Note:**

> Hello bbys,  
> This is the first time I've written a fanfic, so I hope you'll like it. *v*  
> Feel free to leave comments, I would be happy to read them.  
> On these, I'm going to read a little exo smut.  
> Love,  
> N


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